‘Mirror, Mirror on the wall’: a reflection on body image – by Jaden

In this blog, Jaden, an 18-year-old based in the UAE, writes about her journey with body image, a topic that is highly influential on young people’s mental health. She reflects on her evolving perceptions of her body and explores how social media has influenced her sense of self-worth.

While I can’t recall the first time I looked in the mirror, I do remember the first time it meant something to me. It wasn’t just a casual glance to check if my shirt was tucked in properly or a quick look at my hair. It was the first time I really looked in the mirror—examined, inspected, criticised.

Since then, I don’t think I have ever simply “looked” in a mirror. There is always some sort of scrutiny involved, even if it’s a tiny voice in the back of my head. Unfortunately, that voice accompanies many of us. The voice arises quietly, without raising any alarm bells. It will start with a simple request to get you to suck in your stomach a little more. Until it progresses to what can only be called relentless abuse – a casual “you’re absolutely disgusting,” or “this is what you get for gorging so much, you pig.” And to that I say: “mirror, mirror, on the wall – why am I the most worthless of them all?”

It gets to a point where it becomes debilitating. The mirror transforms from a simple reflective surface into a battleground. Every glance becomes a confrontation, every reflection a critique. You start to avoid mirrors, dreading the inevitable onslaught of negativity. It infiltrates every aspect of your life, gnawing away at your self-esteem and distorting your self-image.

The impact of this internal critic extends far beyond the bathroom mirror. It seeps into social interactions, influencing how you perceive yourself in relation to others. You begin to compare yourself constantly, often unfavourably, to those around you. You scrutinise photos, dissecting every flaw, and soon, even the idea of being photographed becomes a source of anxiety.

In the digital age, where social media often amplifies these insecurities, the pressure can be overwhelming. Curated feeds filled with flawless images create an unattainable standard of beauty and success. It feels like everyone else has it all figured out, while you’re stuck wrestling with your own reflection. The more you scroll, the louder the critical voice becomes, feeding off the illusion of perfection that’s been carefully constructed online.

Of course, this isn’t uncommon, particularly for young people. Many grapple with their self-image, often silently. The journey to self-acceptance and a healthier relationship with mirrors—and by extension, oneself—can be long and challenging, but it is possible. It starts with small steps: recognising the negative self-talk, questioning its validity, and gradually replacing it with kinder, more compassionate thoughts.

Building a positive self-image requires patience and effort. It involves surrounding yourself with supportive individuals, engaging in activities that boost your confidence, and sometimes seeking professional help. Therapy can be a valuable tool in unravelling the deep-seated beliefs that fuel the critical voice. It helps in understanding that these thoughts are not facts, and it’s possible to cultivate a more loving and accepting perspective towards oneself.

In time, the mirror can become a friend rather than a foe. You can learn to look at your reflection without judgement, to see the person staring back at you as someone worthy of love and respect. It’s a journey of self-discovery, of peeling away the layers of criticism to reveal a core of self-acceptance. As you take each step forward, the voice of self-criticism grows quieter, making room for a kinder, more compassionate inner dialogue.

I look in the mirror today and the voice is still there. It probably won’t ever leave. But it gets quieter. With each passing day, its influence over me wanes. The same goes for you.

Because soon you will learn to say, “mirror, mirror, on the wall– I am enough, above all.”

Author bio:

Hello, my name is Jaden! I’m 18 years old and I’m originally from India but based in the UAE. My mental health is something that I have struggled with for a long time, and as I slowly find myself getting back up on my feet, I’m incredibly passionate about using my past as an anchor to hopefully help and support others going through the same thing. I’m an aspiring author and hope to someday make a difference in this world. I love reading, writing, playing the piano, and my dogs!

Interested in reading more of my writing? Check out this blog I have previously written for the Wolfson Centre on the topic of Bravery.

Jaden’s social media:

Twitter, Instagram, TikTok

jqden.mas@gmail.com

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Interested in learning more? Email maximom@cardiff.ac.uk with some information about yourself and what topic you would like to write about.

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